Tuesday, August 17, 2010

11 years of belly laughs cont...

The above photo was taken of Jeff by Camas Washington photographer Angie Beesley. To view more of her work check out her blog http://angiebeesleyphotography.blogspot.com

I always knew I wanted to be a mom. When I thought about what it would be like I imagined the teaching and nurturing I would do.

I was prepared for sleepless nights of endless feedings and even more endless crying Those nights never came and instead I sat quietly by you while you slept like a champion. I was ready for difficult questions that had no real answers but it seemed that you were always satisfied with what I could tell you. I was prepared for moments when I questioned my decision to have kids but I have never had one. There is not one moment I wouldn’t re-live with you.

What I never expected was how much I would learn from you. You have taught me so much about myself and so much about the world. You have taught me how expansive my heart is. When you were born I never imagined I could love someone more. But each day as you grew my heart also grew to include all the new ways I would love you.

I couldn’t imagine how awesome and fun a person you would turn into. One of the only people that can make me laugh until my stomach hurts. From our mommy/baby WWF wrestling when you were a baby to the funny stories we make up trying to one up each other.

I couldn’t be more proud of you then I am and I wouldn’t change anything about you. I am so proud to be your mom and I am thankful everyday for the day you were born.

Happy Birthday!

11 years of belly laughs...





Monday, August 16, 2010

Perfectly




When our babies are in the creation process we worry and we hang on to every opportunity to hear their little heart pumping. When they make their grand debut we anxiously count fingers and toes. As they grow we measure them and evaluate them constantly checking them against the norm. Always hoping that our child will fit in. In where exactly do we hope they will fit? In the boxes where we place all things “normal.” So what happens when our children don’t fit perfectly into those boxes? I think for most of us the idea is so heart breaking and scary that we don’t even want to think about it.

This summer I have met a little boy who has changed my life; though I doubt he realizes it. He has changed me by just being himself. I walked away from this photo session feeling so alive and inspired by this young man and those who care for him and about him. He doesn’t fit in a perfect little box but is instead defining his own shape in the most magical and inspiring ways. So smart, funny and beyond captivating that within minutes of meeting him you forget what he faces and are pulled into his magical charm.

Right from the start you all felt like old friends and I thank you for the warmth you have all made me feel.

And, especially to you "A"thank you for being such a big inspiration and allowing me to share a little in your life. My heart is pushing against the sides of the perfect little box that has confined it - and I like it. I like it a lot.